worthyourweightinfanfiction:

armadillo:

REAL TALK IF THERES A FIRE AT MY SCHOOL I AM NOT WALKING IN AN ORDERLY FASHION AND THEN GETTING MY NAME MARKED OFF IM RUNNING FOR MY LIFE AND IM TAKING MY GOD DAMN BAG WITH ME 

one time there was an unscheduled fire alarm and i just happened to have my bag on my shoulder when it went off so my teacher made me go back into what, to his knowledge, was a burning building so i could put my bag back

(Source: bastille, via bootyncutie)

awwww-cute:

My dog got excited when I got home from work and ran around me while peeing
thingsicanchangethingsicant:

16.9.14 -searching for original source

metafuneral:

ajaxdotcom:

metafuneral:

teacher: hey you are failing your classes idiot

student: you know what teach? i dont give a swag *walks out*

that student.. as you may have already guessed.. was albert einstein

um..i think you made this up for notes?

first of all, how dare you

(Source: stagnantwater447-8995, via beyoncevevo)